the MAKE ME AN ALBUM project update III

the 4th golden ticket has been found! that's right, children, lucky Mike Teavee of Marble Falls, AZ was number 231. congrats, mike!

mike teavee, along with jackie nelson, dan h., and casey peterson, will be invited to my mysterious song factory to witness a once-in-a-lifetime spectacle of whizzing whatzits, meandering melodies, rhapsodic recordings, and hypnotic harmonies! children all over the world have yearned for this opportunity. now it is yours!

(then the creepy slugworth dude steps in and mumbles something in mike teavee's ear)
"michael. michael teavee. going to tom kain's song factory may sound like a splendid affair, but i urge you to decline the invitation. inside that insidious factory, mr. kain employs miniature goblins, called "impy limpys," who do all his dirty work and give advice to greedy children in song! imagine the horror! mr. kain himself even stabs himself in the gut - in public - to deliver some mystery medication he calls "insulin." do you want to subject not only yourself, but also your precious parents, to such terror? i advise you to give your ticket away, to a much more wretched soul, one whose eyes deserve to behold such dreadful sights!"

"ok. i'll give it away."

"yes. good choice. who is the recipient? i will deliver it myself."

"joe sery."

"joseph sery, the minnesota lad. i know him."

(slugworth approaches joe sery)

"mr. sery. you have been selected to receive a golden ticket to mr. tom kain's song factory! you know how special this is, do you not?"

"TOM KAIN'S SONG FACTORY!?!?! I AM SOILING MY BRITCHES. I HAVE LOST ALL BODILY CONTR"

"now. you know that you must present the magical mr. kain with a song title that he will work into a sensational symphony of sound. do you have something ready?"

"YES. I HAVE SAVED THIS TITLE FOR 29 YEARS INCLUDING THE 5 I SPENT IN MY MOTHER'S SPACIOUS WOMB CAVITY."

"out with it, boy!"

"I'M WITH STUPID AND I'M ALONE!"

and, with that, the mysterious mr. kain was saddled with his project's fourth, most difficult challenge.

good thing that in the movie, mike teavee gets broken into millions of little bits and shrunk by the television chocolate camera. a similar fate awaits joe.

number 315 is still up for grabs. oh, by the way, i've recorded "take my pink slip!" it sounds like a mixture of old country, blues, and motown; three genres i've never really dabbled in. and i decided to dabble in them for the first time.... all at the same time. BOOM, BITCH.